So it’s 2017, I’m 37 years old, overweight with health issues absolutely directly as a result of the extra 4 stone in weight I’m carrying around with me daily, and I am sat looking at family photographs that have just been posted on social media from the Christmas period.
There isn’t any of me. I was there and of course, my family loves me, but I honestly cannot bear to have my photo taken. Even with how bad I now feel looking at these images, as I do every single time there is a family
occasion and inevitably the camera phones come out and I hide. The way I feel about myself is actually so depressingly paralyzing that the anxiety around the simple lovely act of capturing a moment in a photo is just too painful for me and sadly the whole thing becomes an all-consuming cycle of self-hate.
This was me, Lisa Little on a very personal level, but in no way the Lisa Little people knew, and definitely not how even my closest friends and family would have described me. You will have heard that old saying “you can go a lifetime and never really know someone”….. this is so very true for me. On the outside, I appear to have all my ducks in a row, and for the most part, I do.
Occasionally though one slips out of line and you might just get a glimpse of the truly venerable chaotic sole underneath. So also at 37 years old, I’m a successful Deputy Hotel Manager of a 4-star hotel employing over 100
people. I have a beautiful family, 3 children and a husband that I adore. We have a lovely home, 2 nice cars, 3 overseas holidays a year and regularly eat out, shop and generally live our best lives.
Everything’s easy for me right? I mean, who do I think I even am wining about a bit of weight?
Remember that earlier quote about never really knowing a person….. I am so good at showing you the Lisa I want you to see. And at this point in my life, it was the completely together version of me. When in truth, I had worked my absolute arse off to have what I had in life. Don’t worry no need for violins at this point, save them for later blogs!
You see, my start in life had not been an average one, don’t get me wrong I was loved beyond belief by my Nan who had raised me until she died in 2012 something that in itself had led to the spiraling uncontrollable weight gain, depression and chaotic personal life, I now had become used to. I did not know my mother until I was 26, I was raised in an area, that you could not describe as affluent and the school I went to taught us how to fill in application forms for job seekers allowance.
So, without the detail, you can surely agree there was no silver spoon in my mouth at any point. In my life, I have dealt with many challenges, being a looked after child, teenage pregnancy, domestic abuse, experiences that could see me have my own #metoo movement, mental illness and many
more that would have and did see others completely breakdown.
I have also had many more amazingly lovely experience’s and these are the ones I intend to share with you in future blogs. No matter the experience, I have and always will face them head-on, and sometimes I may fall but I
always get back up. Everything I have in life, and everything still to come, I work for.
So sitting there as I was at 37 looking at these photos, I made a decision to reach out to a personal trainer for help. Little did I know this decision would lead to my whole life-changing beyond belief and would become one of the best decisions I had ever made in my life.
I am going to end this blog here as it has many ways in which I could take you, and if you really are interested, there will be many blogs to follow.
In short after meeting my PT I lost that 4 stone that had literally been a weighted vest of emotions, sadness, grief and pain and I fell in love with fitness and gained confidence I never had before. Along the way, I lost the job I had work so hard for, a career I had dedicated over 20 years of my life to and I was now 40 years old.
I made the decision to start again, I went back to school, retrained in anatomy, physiology and nutrition, set up my own business and prepared to start again. In honor of my life story, my roots and me, I named my business From the Block Fitness. A nickname given to me by a very dear friend……
Lisa From the Block.x